Contentment Helps Fight Stress and Depression

This article should in no way be construed as a substitute for medical advice. If you are suffering from a prolonged or severe bout of depression, or have suicidal thoughts, please seek qualified medical help immediately.

W

e are the richest people materially who have ever lived on this planet, and yet we seem to be the most dissatisfied. The quest for bigger and better and more and faster is obviously not making us happy, since stress and depression are epidemic. What's missing?

What is missing is a sense of contentment; a sense of being satisfied. We are constantly told that who we are and what we have isn't good enough. We 'deserve' better. And we won't be happy until we get it. It seems that we never quite have everything we should, and if we could just obtain those other things, then we would be content. This all forgets a very key point:

Contentment is not having what you want. It is wanting what you have.

While being a hard worker is definitely a valuable trait for one to have, the question really comes down to what we are working for. As the recent economic crisis has shown, the constant striving after more has not left us with any real security. Too many people have lost jobs and homes for any of us to really feel secure. Because we can't figure out what it is we really need, we are constantly striving after what we are told we should want.

For example, I used to have a residential cleaning business, and many of my clients had large beautiful homes. One fact that always struck me, though, was how many of them didn't really enjoy their homes. Cleaning their houses every two weeks, month after month, I was constantly amazed that they never entered the vast majority of the rooms. I was sure of that because I would always try to vacuum myself out of the room so as not to leave footprints. That way, when they came home, they could obviously see that they were the first to enter since it had been cleaned. But in many of these rooms, no one had even set foot in them, because the only footprints their carpets would see were mine! This would be the case, month after month.

So we have to ask ourselves, are all of the long hours at work and all of the house payments really worth it? For houses so big we don't even have time or energy to walk through each of the rooms? To me, the answer is clearly that it isn't worth it.

In 2003 The Australian cited a study conducted by the University of New South Wales and the Australian National University. It stated: “Many of us are spending more time at work and doing household tasks than is strictly necessary.” After researchers calculated the amount of time a working couple without children needed to work in order to provide the bare necessities of life, they then compared the calculated time to the amount of time they actually spend on those activities. The study found that childless working couples “spent a combined 79 hours a week at work, 37 hours on household tasks and 138 hours on personal care, but they only needed to work 20 hours a week [10 hours each], do household tasks for 18 hours and spend 116 hours on personal care [including eating and sleeping],” says the paper. If a couple were willing to scale back, they could gain as many as 100 additional hours of free time a week. The study, according to The Australian, suggests that working couples without children “claim to be most pressured for time, but are, in fact, the least time-strapped of any group, with parents far more pressed for time.”

So what's the point? We don't know how to be content, and we are suffering for it. Some might claim that all of the little gadgets and conveniences that we have make our lives more enjoyable, but as the above study shows, we are spending so much time obtaining that we don't have time left for enjoying. And in the last 6 or 7 years, it's obviously gotten worse.

So how can contentment help reduce stress and depression? One way is by reducing the clutter in our lives. If we don't need 4 or 5 bedrooms, why pay for them - both physically and mentally? Why pay for the upkeep and maintenance of items we don't have the time to use fully? We just end up throwing away time and money.

A second way it helps is that it reduces the burden of debt we carry. If we only need to work 10 hours a week to buy necessities, where does the other 60 hours a week go? To things we don't need and probably can't even find the time to use. By living a simpler lifestyle, we have less to pay for and less to maintain, so there is less money and time needed. And in uncertain economic times, we won't be quite so close to the brink of financial ruin.

Another way contentment can help is that it allows us time for the really important things. In the report mentioned earlier, imagine the things a couple could do together if they each had an extra 50 hours a week free! That's roughly 3 full waking days extra, each week! Conversely, that means we are losing almost half of each week, unnecessarily.  It's no wonder we feel stressed and depressed.

Like any habit, it's hard to break the discontentment trap. Start small, with easily obtainable steps. Get rid of some small items you just don't want or don't have time to use. Be happy with the cell phone or car you own now. Don't buy the hype that you are a somehow lesser person just because you don't own something newer or better. Focus on the good things you have and how you can enjoy them. And then divest yourself of whatever extras are weighing you down.

As the Apostle Paul wrote in the Bible, "For we have brought nothing into the world, and neither can we carry anything out. So, having sustenance and covering, we shall be content with these things."